I’m 31 weeks pregnant (so exciting) and I’m currently feeling absolutely exhausted, after an amazing weekend. My fall-themed baby shower was Saturday and I love my people for making my shower so special. A huge thank you to everyone who came to the Champagne Brunch at The Smithville Inn to shower Andrew, baby Greyson, and I with love and support (thank you cards will be sent out shortly, Xo). Andrew and I are still busy with home renovations, but everything is coming together (slowly). We are so excited for the months ahead and I cannot wait to meet our little pumpkin!
I want to address something that fell into my lap a few days ago, regarding attention and love. Someone asked me whether or not I viewed extensive gift giving as a gesture of love, or simply attention. I’d love to answer that question for everyone to read, because as women we grow up thinking men are supposed to shower us with gifts and overly romantic gestures, but that isn’t realistic. He doesn’t have to come home with diamonds everyday, but he DOES have to be loyal, loving, and thoughtful. There’s a huge difference between attention and love; attention can be given to you at anytime and by anyone (a guy at Wawa whistling at you, or strangers liking your social media photos), but when someone loves you, attention turns into affection and dedication. Love is an intense, terrifying, and beautiful emotion that can change a person’s entire life. Finding the right person, the one you wish to spend the rest of your days with is life-altering; A person who loves you will of course, give you attention, but it’s deeper than that when a person truly cares about you. It’s not an act of love, buying someone an expensive gift (and that doesn’t mean we don’t appreciate gifts), but an act of love is coming home every single night and caring for your significant other. Yes, it’s okay to obsess over a present from your significant other and share it with the world (if you choose), but constantly posting about elaborate gifts is uncomfortable (and unnecessary).
To answer the question I was asked a few days ago, I don’t view extensive gift giving as a gesture of love, but rather attention. If a man feels as though he must buy his woman a weekly, pricey gift (we see this displayed on social media, constantly) I view that situation as a man who feels he needs to overcompensate, or who feels insecure in his relationship. When we feel insecure, we tend to go above and beyond to impress and express, because we feel as though our presence and thoughtful nature isn’t enough. Ladies, we don’t need our men to bring home jewelry, designer shoes, and purchase us brand-new vehicles in order to feel loved and cared for. We need our men to stand by us through sickness, health, financial struggles, bad days, and good. We need loyalty, respect, endless laughs, and beautiful adventures. Attention can be a dangerous thing and many crave attention in unhealthy ways. Remember, the man who doesn’t feel he needs to overcompensate, because he knows he isn’t going anywhere, and he trusts that you’ll always be there, will shower you with love, not just attention.* You want someone who does far more than just pays attention to you! Attention won’t be enough to get you through raising a family, dealing with an illness, or a financial crisis, but having the one who loves you by your side will get you through everything and anything. Treasure the little things.
I want to help others dealing with home renovations and home improvement projects this October feel a little less stressed, because I know how exhausting it can be! Fall is a beautiful time and many embark on new adventures during the fall/winter months, including designing new, functional spaces. Renovating is exciting and fun, but it’s also a lot of money, time, and energy spent. Once you think everything is perfect, there is always something else! Take it one step (and project) at a time. If you cannot afford to get everything done, don’t stress…you’ll accomplish everything in time. Watch HGTV for inspiration and you’ll notice that some couples take months, even years to finish projects (you’re never alone), and NO home is perfect. Home renovations tend to cause unwanted fights and issues with loved ones, which may sound dramatic, but when our space is invaded, we feel trapped. We wake up feeling suffocated by ideas and tasks. Andrew is currently dealing with our home renovation projects, such as designing the nursery (exciting), putting in new hardwood flooring (I’m in love), and painting. There’s no clean or easy way to get through renovations, because no matter how hard you try, things will be moved, furniture will be coated with dust, and you will always lose your mind! I do have some advice though, which is vacuum, dust, and organize as much as you can, each day while you renovate. Cleaning lightly will make you feel better about the disarray of things! Clean out old drawers and pantries and get rid of unwanted items and furniture, BEFORE the renovation is done. It’s the perfect time (and reason) to donate and get rid of what you don’t need to make room for a fresh, new look.
Lastly, I’d like to promote one of my favorite, cruelty-free makeup brands for Fall 2018 and beyond…NYX Cosmetics. NYX has been a committed member of PETA’s Beauty Without Bunnies program since 2010. In 2014, though NYX was acquired by L’Oréal, a company who chooses to sell to China, where testing on animals is required. But, despite being acquired by L’Oréal, NYX Cosmetics has maintained their commitment to a strict no animal testing policy and is a cruelty–free brand! I buy as many cruelty-free products as possible, and I truly hope that all companies who continue to test on animals put a permanent stop to the unnecessary harm, because it would make shopping much easier and would save so many, innocent lives. NYX has beautiful displays at Target, and they’re fully stocked for Fall 2018 with new shades, along with ELF Cosmetics (also a cruelty-free brand). If you’re interested in investing in other cruelty-free, and Beauty Without Bunnies brands, please check out:
There will be another posting of L&L by Lizzie on Friday…enjoy the rest of your week and hopefully cooler, fall temperatures are heading our way. Xo