It has been a very emotional, trying, yet beautiful month. We had to move unexpectedly during my 38th week of pregnancy, unpack an entire home in two days, I was induced at 39 weeks, spent three days in the hospital, and then came home to a space that was still new to me with a newborn and my four-year-old. We had to move to get away from toxicity caused by a family member and it was the best decision we ever made, despite how hard it was. I’m still tired and trying to feel “normal” again in my postpartum chapter. It has been emotionally and physically exhausting, to say the least. I’m so thankful for my two beautiful children and my husband who remind me constantly of my strength. I’m also very lucky to have friends who have turned into family. At the end of the day though, dealing with postpartum after the month I’ve had has been difficult. Each day gets easier but I don’t think I’ve ever endured more in such a short period of time. I know one day I’ll look back and be amazed at my ability to move forward and my inner strength.
2023 didn’t begin the way I thought it would. I envisioned myself relaxing with a good book, cuddled up on the couch, with a favorite candle lit, awaiting the arrival of our daughter Waverly. Instead of relaxation, I was handed the exact opposite. I said goodbye to so much in a matter of days and said hello to a completely new chapter overnight. When I was leaving for the hospital to be induced it felt as though I was completely numb. My body was so sore from packing and then unpacking. I was very pregnant and my feet throbbed. When I got home from the hospital though, with our beautiful baby girl, my eyes flooded with tears. I was no longer numb. I was feeling every emotion my body had been trying so desperately to block out for the past couple of weeks. Everything I had just endured hit me like a tornado. I spent every night for a week after returning from the hospital crying until finally, I had let all of my emotions out. I felt relieved and lighter, but I also felt overwhelmed. When you’re dealing with so much at once, especially as a mama, you’re too busy surviving to break down. Once survival mode ended I was able to be raw and honest.
Now, I can honestly say that I survived a very stressful and emotional month. I have truly grown as a person. I am no longer looking in the rearview mirror and I’m embracing our new chapter with clear eyes and a grateful heart. I am a firm believer in the power of the universe and that everything happens for a reason. Trying moments are placed in our path, but there’s always beauty at the end of the road. I have time to enjoy the little things again that make me really happy…sitting on the front porch early in the morning, writing, enjoying a good book, and yoga. To all of the mamas going through a hard time, just remember that there’s happiness and laughter just around the corner. Embrace every moment, even the ones that scare you, because they’re all a part of your story. Be proud of your story, every page.
Congratulations! Wishing you endless joy as you welcome this new little girl into your world!
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Thank you so much!!