How to be a Happy and Healthy Stay at Home Mom
I am officially back to being a full time stay at home mama and I’ve never been happier. I still have my own business, Petsitting by Lizzie LLC, but my animal care business doesn’t take away from my daily job as a mother. Any mom who cares for another life every day can attest to the fact that becoming a parent changes your life in ways you never could’ve imagined. It’s a beautiful, sleepless, crazy ride. I wake up every morning feeling so thankful and blessed to be Greyson’s mama. I’m also very grateful for my husband, Andrew, who wakes up before the sun and comes home late in the evening in order to provide for us.
There’s a country song by Craig Campbell called “When Ends Don’t Meet” and in the song he sings, “She knows I’m out there doing the best I can, trying to keep these wolves away with my bare hands” and those lyrics remind me of Andrew and the way he protects us, fiercely. He’s the hardest worker I’ve ever known and he accomplishes so much. Without him I wouldn’t be able to stay home with Greyson, and I know that not every woman has the choice or opportunity to be a stay at home mom. If you are doing what you need to do to provide for yourself and your family, please don’t ever forget how amazing you are.
You can call me whatever you’d like, a housewife, a homemaker, or a stay at home mother. I don’t find any of those titles to be insulting or offensive. I’m happy and comfortable with my life and the choice I made to be at home rather than at work. The world we live in is overwhelmed with judgement and titles cling to us, but there’s nothing wrong with being a housewife (or a homemaker, a stay at home mom, etc.). If you’re able to stay at home and it’s something you want for yourself, do it. It isn’t a lifestyle that works for every woman and I know many who would rather be working than at home. I know many who make fun of housewives and very often people picture the cast from Bravo’s The Real Housewives franchise when they hear that word, but that’s not reality. I do dress up some days, go out to lunch with close friends, and I love a good shopping spree, but most days are spent at home, living the mommy life with my beautiful boy and getting things done. I clean, cook (use my crockpot lol), do laundry, take care of our household, and I hold everything together like a pair of bookends.
I fill our home with laughter and love and that’s my job. I have moments of relaxation and free time that I like to fill with reading, writing, projects, and outdoor adventures when the weather allows. I’d much rather be going on adventures with my son and be able to greet my husband at the door when he comes home than working. Again, I am lucky enough to be able to be home, but I did go back to work after having Greyson. I worked in the fashion retail and marketing world from age sixteen until I had Greyson last December. I’ve also had my own, successful business (pet sitting, dog walking, animal training, and animal care) since 2014.
I decided to go back to work as a Brand Representative in September at a pretty, bohemian store called Altar’d State. I was a loyal customer and in many ways I am the brand. I’m a young, spiritual, bohemian woman and that is the target audience. I loved the clothes, the brand, the customers, and my coworkers. I loved doing what I have done for years and doing it well, but I felt stressed, tired, and my days became pretty complicated. I piled so much on my plate that my physical and mental health were being affected. As a committed mama, my health is far too important to take lightly. I left my job right after Thanksgiving and although it was a bittersweet feeling, I immediately felt relief. My mental state improved within days and I already feel healthier and happier. I am able to work out again whenever I want, diet the way I wish, and do whatever makes me smile each day. I have time and freedom and that feels amazing. The best version of myself is who I am right now, drinking a glass of wine, playing with my baby boy on the floor of his nursery, and waiting for Andrew to get home from a busy day.
I know that sometimes being a mama can feel lonely and exhausting. I know that some days are harder, or longer than others and that parenthood is a never ending journey. I know that falling asleep at night feels a little different, because your mind never stops going, and you’re constantly making lists, worrying about your little one, and planning ahead. I know that it takes a little longer to get ready to go places and that you spend a lot more money. I know that running an errand isn’t as simple as it used to be and there will always be people in your life that simply don’t understand. If you look pretty, you’re smiling, and you’re breathing, it must’ve been an easy day…right? No, sometimes you’re just incredible at hiding how long and hard the day was. I know all of this to be true mamas, but I also know another truth…it’s the best job in the world, being a mom. Sadly, we aren’t offered promotions, paid vacations, or raises, but we are raising the next generation. What’s more important than that?
As a stay at home mama, I take my job seriously and I never take it for granted. I enjoy every second and I love teaching my angel to be the best boy he can be. Every moment is a learning experience in our household and it’s so beautiful watching him grow, learn, and laugh. I stay happy and healthy by doing what’s best for me and by smiling often. I let go of the little things and I don’t let stupid issues ruin my day. I accept the fact that I’m not perfect and no day will ever play out the way we expect it to, no matter how many lists we make. I say I love you more than anything else and sometimes I put my phone in another room…it’s not as important as the moment I’m in right now. Be present and be aware. I get dressed up, put on makeup, and do my hair, but I also love the days I stay in my pajamas and don’t wear any makeup. I don’t care about selfies or posts on social media, but I do care about taking photos of my gorgeous boy and the moments that matter. I eat as healthy as I possibly can (but I also treat myself) and I believe a glass of wine every night is good for you. I do yoga and, or workout every night and I remind myself that failure isn’t who I am as a person. It’s never an option. I try to speak as beautifully as possible in front of Greyson but I’m only human. I curse sometimes, say stupid things I don’t mean, and I get angry from time to time…duh. It’s okay to be human. Embrace your emotions and be unapologetically you.
There’s no rule book or any true guidelines to being happy at home with your child, but it’s a choice only you can make and you have control over your days and your environment. My best advice is to let go of anything that makes you feel stressed and upset when you wake up in the morning. Whatever it is, it isn’t worth the negative emotions. I allowed a job to affect my mental and physical health because we live in a world that makes us feel bad for not working, but if you have the option to walk away…walk away. If you could never imagine yourself being a stay at home mom than continue working. I still have a business of my own, many passions, and I get to do what I love most of all and that is taking care of my son. Try to find a happy medium and go from there. If you can scale back and work part time instead of full time, or maybe you also have a business of your own that allows you to make your own schedule, or you have great passions, you can explore all of your options. If you’re a single mother, or your household needs two incomes, that’s okay. Remember, you’re doing what you need to do for the ones that matter most and that’s strength.
My husband and I communicate about everything and he knew I wasn’t happy working anymore and I knew that he wanted me home. He wanted me to wake up every morning with no worries and to fall asleep at night feeling at peace. I love him so much for always considering my feelings and for supporting me. Communication is so important when you’re a stay at home mama because it ensures that you and your significant other are always on the same page. It’s important to have a monthly budget, to save money, and to stay on top of tasks and projects. Before you make the leap and decide to ditch your current routine and be home long term (or short term) communicate with your partner. Speak honestly and openly about what you want, what you need, and what you can live without. Also, allow your inner child to speak to you and with help from your childhood spirit have fun with your daily life, especially if you are at home full time. As a parent, some of the best moments are the ones where your inner child comes to visit, whether you’re playing make believe and storytelling, or you’re embarking on an adventure. You’re never too old to read a fairytale, watch an animated movie, or play with toys.
I know that if my boy ends his day with a smile that it was a good day. Little victories are big victories and small moments are much larger than they seem. I have learned so much from Greyson and although he’s only been alive for a year (he turned one on December 8th), he has so much wisdom and there’s a lot to be learned from an innocent heart. I am grateful for the life I have, my boy, my husband, and the choices I’ve made for myself. Mamas, you know what’s in your heart and no one can ever tell you you’re wrong for knowing what’s best for you. Live and love fearlessly and the rest will fall into place.
Best of luck to all of the mamas and parents out there ♥️ Keep up the good, inspiring work and never forget how strong and resilient you are.