I’m headed to New York City today for a Passover Seder at my brother’s. Yesterday I did all of my Easter dinner food shopping, and I’m excited to cook my Easter menu. This year, I am making my famous sweet potato casserole, creamy garlic and herb mashed potatoes, southern skillet mac and cheese, roasted garlic parmesan carrots, and Andrew will be making his brown sugar ham. We’ll also be having an Easter egg hunt at our farm in the morning for Greyson, which has become a yearly tradition. I hope you’re all enjoying a beautiful, holiday weekend with friends and family. Easter and Passover are a symbol of hope and they’re both a reminder of the beauty of spring.
Easter is one of my favorite holidays and I love this time of the year. The air feels fresh and the days are longer. It’s a time to renew and breathe in the new season. Growing up, we always went to my grandmother Connie’s house for Easter and she made it so special. She would make her incredible deviled eggs, decorate her quaint house with bunnies and flowers, and fill plastic eggs with candy and money for me. I would be wearing a beautiful, girlie dress bought specifically for Easter. It was always a perfect day. When I got married and became a mom, I carried on my holiday traditions and made every holiday extra special.
The most important aspect of Easter in my opinion is filling your home with spring energy and decor. I have a gorgeous, peach-colored bouquet of roses on my coffee table, bunnies greeting you in our living room, and a spring garland draped over the fireplace mantle. I have spring candles ready to be lit and spring accents, such as a white, metal birdcage with two porcelain birds inside, adding spring vibes to our home. All of the plants in our kitchen are so healthy and vibrant, which makes me happy.
Creating a beautiful home and holiday memories comes down to the little details, such as candles, flowers, and an Easter menu. I always create and print out an Easter menu, so we all know what to look forward to for dinner. I get up extra early and set up Greyson’s Easter basket in our living room, filled with presents and a card from the Easter bunny. I set up a little tray with a carrot, or two, and some candy for the Easter bunny, which always makes Greyson smile. I enjoy making each moment beautiful and for my home to reflect that beauty. I always say, creating a beautiful space starts with cleaning and organizing. I clean every day, but before a holiday I ensure that every inch of my home is clean and all of my tasks are done, such as laundry, dishes, etc. It’s easier to enjoy a holiday if everything is in order. Even when I’m cooking, I clean as I go. Organization is key.
I also love decorating our deck and yard for springtime. I’m constantly going to Home Depot and a local garden center near me this time of the year. My deck and yard are filled with plants and decor, which I always say is a great way to welcome the Easter bunny. When you walk onto our deck you’re greeted with flowers, a pretty tulip wreath, and decor. Our outdoor bench is decorated with spring pillows and we have farmhouse touches, such as a rustic welcome sign leaning against the house.
If you’re wanting to add something special to your space for tomorrow, go out today and buy some plants for inside and outside (even some cooking plants like Basil or Sage, which you’ll love to have for recipes), a bouquet of fresh flowers, and some spring candles. Target has the best candles and spring decor.
I wish all of my readers a gorgeous Easter and Passover. May your weekend be filled with good food, laughter, and spring magic.
Hi, mamas. We are all familiar with feeling bullied, pressured, or excluded for being different and daring to stand out, or for seeing something different from our peers. We often disagree with our friends’ political views, what they serve for Thanksgiving dinner, or what car they choose to buy, but as parents, the judgment, bullying, and commentary can be much harsher. When you become a mom, there’s a new term you find yourself way too familiar with, and that is “mom-shaming”.
I’m sure all of my readers are familiar with the term, but if you’re not, mom-shaming is when a person criticizes a mom for her parenting choices, choices that differ from the ones the shamer makes or made in the past. In our world, which is controlled greatly by social media and technology, mom-shaming often happens on social media platforms, or via text message on our close companions, our smartphones. It’s easy and quick to text a mom friend of ours a judgmental text, offering up suggestions that they don’t need in regards to their parenting choices. Why? Why do moms shame other moms? Why do grandparents, parents, friends, or co-workers judge moms for their choices that are very much their own? Well, we live in a society that has taught us from day one to judge a book by its cover and to gossip more than we listen. We learn from a young age that a nice car, big house, and frame-worthy photographs are the mark of a successful family. If a family doesn’t have those three things we assume they’re not successful. We often define success and happiness for others without their permission.
We learn by watching movies and television shows that judging others is normal and okay. The Real Housewives and The Kardashian’s do it for a living. Do we all do it? Yes, of course, we do. But, some subjects shouldn’t be touched on and many of us have manners and know boundaries. Unfortunately, some of us do not. Shaming a mom for her choice not to breastfeed, to stay home with her children, or to be open about postpartum depression is not okay. As a mom, I know that mom-shaming is very real and it can be very traumatic.
I have read countless Facebook posts created by moms openly shaming other moms for their choice of a car seat, stroller, school, and even Halloween costume. I remember reading a post a while back where a mom posted a photo of her car seat, demonstrating with her child in the car seat, the proper way to buckle a child in, especially during the colder months when a child is wearing many layers. I couldn’t believe a mom had the time to post something so degrading and bossy on social media. She mentioned that some moms don’t understand how a car seat works. It was as if she believed herself to be the only mother in the world who knew how to safely buckle their child up in a car seat. Posts such as that one are constant and unfortunately, social media gives everyone a platform to say mean and ignorant comments.
When Kim Kardashian said that she had good advice for women in business, “Get your f–king ass up and work. It seems like nobody wants to work these days.” we all laughed and lost respect for her as a woman, whether we are in business or not. It sounded insane hearing from such a wealthy and well-off person who has been on reality television for much of her adult life, that women in business should all get up off of their asses. Kim K is no doubt successful, and to many very aspirational, but she’s a celebrity that doesn’t necessarily relate to women from all walks of life. We didn’t accept this language or commentary from her, so why as a society do we accept mom-shaming so easily?
We live in a world that judges more than anything else. Social media, influencers, and marketing campaigns make women (and moms in particular) feel like a failure, less than, or uncomfortable in their skin if they don’t meet unrealistic standards. How many of us have seen a perfect image on social media and immediately compared ourselves or our lives to that image? We all have. We see a woman with two kids clinging to her, with a perfect postpartum figure, and we are immediately made to feel that if our bodies don’t look toned and perfect after giving birth that there’s something wrong with us. We see a mom attending an event at a beautiful school and we believe that all mothers should send their kids to an expensive, private school and push their kids towards Yale, Harvard, and Stanford, despite what our children may grow up to want. Mom-shaming isn’t a new thing, it has been around as long as women have walked this earth, but now with social media, we have new and more powerful weapons. Moms shame other moms because they too have been shamed, or made to feel a certain way (although the shamer may not admit that) because of influencers, reality television, and social media as a whole. Social media shares glimpses into the seemingly “perfect” lives of friends, family, and even strangers, but no one has a perfect life. No one is perfect.
We are all allowed to make our own choices and mistakes. A mistake to one person may not be a mistake to another. Mom-shaming can make a mom feel isolated and alone and motherhood can already be a very lonely place. As a stay-at-home mom, I know that some days are lonely and tiring, but we have the most important job of all. We need to stop the mom-shaming and start celebrating all mothers, regardless of what choices they make for themselves and their children. We all have something in common and we often forget that. I have never allowed any level of mom-shaming to enter my beautiful bubble because I simply tune it out and turn it off. I have had people offer up unsolicited parenting advice from time to time, but I choose to listen to my advice. I have seen so many social media posts and read millions of blurbs that could’ve offended me as a mom, but they don’t because I don’t allow them to. A great way to distance yourself from the mom-shaming and the judgment is to log off of social media when you’re feeling insecure or lonely, because social media makes a person feel more alone and more insecure, despite the brief distraction that it brings. If someone in your life is consistently mom-shaming you, stop engaging with them, or tell them how their comments make you feel.
I also choose not to judge other moms for the choices they make. I may not agree with every mom I know or that I meet (in person or on social media), but I will never make them feel bullied or judge them for what they believe in. For example, I believe that children should’ve been masked during the pandemic when attending school or events, if they were over the age of three because it was a way to protect them from illness (and as a country we lost children to COVID-19), but I would never judge a mom for not wanting their child to wear a mask. It is your choice as a mother to mask your child or unmask your child. Let’s stop the mom-shaming and start accepting each other’s choices and differences.
You can only grow flowers in your garden. Stop worrying about what plants are in someone else’s.
Hi loves! I am so sorry I haven’t been posting on my blog lately, but life gets busy. I wanted to return to my blog with something special and what’s more special than The Greyson Diaries? For those of you who don’t remember, or for those of you who haven’t read The Greyson Diaries before, it is a blog series dedicated to motherhood and my beautiful little boy, named Greyson. I became a stay at home mama in 2019, a few months after giving birth to Greyson. I left my job as the Marketing Assistant to an upscale shopping and dining plaza to live the mommy life and to soak up every moment with my son, which was the best decision I ever made. It’s a little weird at first, leaving the workforce behind, but if you’re able to be a stay at home mama, and it’s something that you want for yourself, I recommend the change. It’s a beautiful change.
I have owned my own company since 2014, Petsitting by Lizzie LLC, which has allowed me to still work when I want to, but I am mostly home and I am truly content. I also own and operate a new company alongside my husband, which is an exterior home improvement company called Killough’s Exterior Repairs LLC. I absolutely love running our company. It’s nice to be able to work from home and since I do all of the marketing, advertising, and scheduling for our clients, I get to use a lot of my skills (my background is Fashion and Marketing). Also, I am currently enrolled in school online at Parsons for Fashion Business, which is exciting, but weekly schoolwork has also added a lot to my plate, so I am looking forward to being done this summer.
I am a stay at home mama at the end of the day, regardless of any other obligations, hobbies, and passions of mine. There’s no job harder than being a parent, but there’s also no better job. I am here to remind you to embrace the messy days and no, I don’t mean literal messes, such as spilled food, I mean life messes. There are days that are filled with chaos, yelling, stress, and sometimes even tears. Yes, we have all locked ourselves in a bathroom and cried. Life messes consist of busy schedules and missed appointments, toddler tantrums that make us want to pull our hair, a few nervous breakdowns and runny mascara, and letting out a scream every now and then. I know how challenging motherhood can be, mamas. I know that some days are so beautiful and easy and others are hard and tiring, but that’s life. We are badasses and we can accomplish it all, even if we need a glass of wine and a cup of coffee to get through the day! I have a very smart, adventurous three year old, and he has his moments, just like all children do. By the way, even as adults we have our moments. I have my cranky, moody days and I know that I am not perfect. I would never expect my child to be perfect and sunny 24/7. Remember, just because your child is small doesn’t mean they’re not entitled to having a bad day, or a few bad days, just like us.
Some days Greyson is cranky and his favorite word is “no” (sound familiar?) and other days he’s easygoing and beyond happy. Some days I have a million errands to run on top of my normal, daily schedule, and I am exhausted at the end of the day. Some days I complain my way through my nightly workout routine, because I just don’t have the energy for it. Some days are chaotic and I feel as though I don’t even have a second to eat. I cannot tell you how many times I simply forgot to eat lunch or an early dinner because the day was so busy. Some days Greyson acts up at a store and I want to yell, but I have to remind myself to keep calm and move on. As mamas, we have to show up and work hard, no matter what. There are no sick days, call outs, or vacation days. Some days we wake up with the flu or a bad cold and we have to push through, no matter how badly we want to just lay in bed all day and binge-watch a Netflix show. Motherhood is messy, but it’s also gorgeous. There are so many more smiles than there are tears. There are so many more sunny days than there are cloudy. I embrace the messes of life and of motherhood because I know that they’re natural, expected, and healthy.
If you lose your cool and you scream when your child is disobeying you, that’s okay. You can explain to your child that even mommy gets upset and stressed sometimes (it’s normal), which is a beautiful thing to teach your child. Emotions are not the enemy. Your child will respect your openness and honesty, especially as they get older. I explain to Greyson often that I suffer from severe anxiety and that sometimes little things are big things to me. I am very open with Greyson and I know that he will come to me when he’s having a bad day and feel comfortable sharing his thoughts and emotions with me, because I will never judge him for feeling the way he feels. Mamas are always told to talk through it and not to yell, to remain cool at all times, and to hide the messes from their kids, but that’s no way to live. Your children even from a young age understand that life is messy. When they break a favorite toy and have an emotional reaction to that toy breaking, when they are sick with a bad cold and their bodies feel tired and overwhelmed, and when they fall in a puddle and get all dirty, they are experiencing the same types of messes that we experience. We are all on the same page and the same team. Allow your children to have bad days and don’t hide life from them. Be there with them to help them through and always be open and communicative. Embrace the messes mamas, because the messes make the clean days well worth it.
December was busy and beautiful. I haven’t had a moment to write until now, cuddled in bed, watching The Real Housewives of New Jersey. The past month was filled with adventure, love, and laughter. We went to The Pocono Mountains in December for vacation to celebrate my son Greyson’s third birthday, spent time with great friends and family, had a perfect Christmas at home, I went to the Nutcracker Ballet performed by The Philadelphia Ballet, and we’ve spent countless hours at the farm with our farm family. It has been a wonderful end to 2021 and I am very thankful for the year that has passed. It was a year of fun, adventure, and growth. I am hoping for a healthy, happy, and adventurous 2022.
I packed up all of my Christmas decorations and decor this morning, but this year I decided to do something a little different and special. I left my snow-flocked, artificial Christmas tree up, but I did remove all of the ornaments. It is just snowy and lit with delicate lights now and it looks beautiful bare. I also left my winter decor out (snowmen, ski decor, tabletop snow flocked trees, pine wreaths). It felt so refreshing packing up Christmas and looking around at the neutral colors in my home. I was craving my usual, neutral color palette in my farmhouse. I fill my home with neutral colors (black, grey, beige, white), aside from our kitchen which is black, white, and farmhouse teal-themed. The farmhouse teal is our pop of color in our kitchen and I love it. I do love adding pops of spring and summer colors during the warmer months, too.
If you’re like me and you’re craving some peace and serenity after the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, transitioning your home from Christmas decor to winter decor is therapeutic. If you’re also like me and you love winter and you want to continue to represent the season in your home, winter decor is a must. Who doesn’t love snow, cuddly blankets, and pine trees?
Here are a few photos from the holiday season to show what my Christmas tree and home looked like before I transitioned to winter decor:
Here’s my tree after transitioning to winter decor:
Tips for Transitioning Your Home From Christmas Decor to Winter Decor…
It’s important to remove the holiday colors from your home (red, green, blue, pink). I had my nutcracker collection everywhere and they always add a lot of vibrance and holiday color (and of course, they’re packed away now). My Christmas tree was also decorated in a red and white theme. The red was present on most of my nutcrackers, my three-foot Santa, candles, reindeer, and on my garland which was draped on my electric fireplace.
Embrace your neutral, winter decor. Pine trees that are snow-flocked, snowmen decor, and neutral-colored deer are perfect for winter. I also love ski and ice skating decor. Fall in love with neutrals and wintry whites this winter season and make your home feel like a cozy, snowy cottage.
Throw blankets and pillows can change the feel from season to season and they’re always an easy add on. Again, I always buy neutral throw blankets (white and ivory are my two favorites). Marshalls and Target are my two shopping destinations for throw blankets and pillows.
White and warm lights are perfect for winter, whether you’re leaving your Christmas tree lit, or you’re adding twinkle lights to your space. I left my Christmas tree lit because the lights make the tree glisten and sparkle at night. You can always add twinkle lights to lanterns and put a lantern (or two) in each room.
Remove the ornaments from your Christmas tree! Ornaments are a beautiful, fun tradition, but they’re too Christmasy for winter.
I am madly in love with our winter-themed farmhouse…
I wish everyone a snowy, cuddly, and inspiring winter season. We are supposed to get quite a bit of snow in Southern New Jersey (where I live) tomorrow afternoon and I hope that we do!
It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas at my house ♥️
I am someone who loves decorating for the holiday season. Every aspect of the holidays makes me so happy, from the cold egg nog to the pretty decor. I always decorate earlier than everyone else, but I like to be merry for more than twenty-five days! There’s nothing better than watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade next to your Christmas tree. I bought our new artificial Christmas tree over the summer from The King of Christmas (an online retailer), because it was on sale, and I was so excited to finally put it up a couple of weeks ago. It’s a six-and-a-half-foot, snow-flocked tree. I am a firm believer in using an artificial tree as opposed to picking out a real one, for multiple reasons, but of course, that’s a personal preference. I am just loving sitting on the couch and looking over at our tree every day. It’s the most magical time of the year and I am hoping to inspire all of you to enjoy your space this holiday season.
I would like to start by saying that it doesn’t matter the size of your home, whether you’re in an apartment or a house, because every home can be filled with beauty and magic for the holidays. I know so many people with tiny spaces that make their homes look enchanting for the holidays. I’m always so impressed with beautiful home styling in smaller spaces. I also know many people who have huge homes that take a lot of time and patience to decorate. I grew up in a large house and my mom filled every single room with a fully decorated, three-foot tree, Santas, and angels. We also had a huge, artificial Christmas tree in our front room, that was lit up with multicolored lights, and decorated with millions of ornaments. My mom made our home feel like Christmas and I have continued with that tradition.
If you don’t have room for a large, six-foot Christmas tree, that’s okay. You can buy a smaller tree, a slim tree (which is great for smaller spaces and there are some really beautiful ones available), or a tabletop tree. I also love adding some real pine trees and holly trees to my outdoor space (my deck and my yard), and I usually light them up with solar Christmas lights, and then we plant the trees in the springtime. I will be planting my two pine trees and my one holly tree at our farm in 2022.
If you have a smaller space, it’s important to make sure your home is organized before decorating to ensure that every bit of your space is functional. You don’t want your holiday season filled with clutter and a mess. It’s the perfect time to donate unwanted or unused items that you don’t need. I always clean our drawers, closets, and donate items in early November, before I decorate and before receiving Christmas presents. As a mom, I also donate some toys of Greyson’s before his December birthday and Christmas. As humans, we tend to accumulate a lot of stuff and it’s nice to cleanse our space.
I don’t have a fireplace with a mantle. I have a really pretty, farmhouse, electric fireplace beneath our tv, that I love, but I cannot hang stockings there. I know that a lot of other people are also lacking a mantle to hang stockings the traditional way, but that doesn’t have to stop you from hanging stockings. I started using a blanket ladder rack to hang my stockings a few years back and now I do it every year! Using a blanket ladder rack allows you to lean it wherever you’d like in your home, too. I use lightweight, plastic stocking hooks to hang my stockings on the ladder and the setup works perfectly. They’re easy to slide and move if need be and the ladder is sturdy so the stockings never fall or shift, no matter how heavy they become with stocking stuffers. I bought my stocking hooks on Amazon and they’re not expensive. I also love draping a Christmas garland on top of my electric fireplace, just like you would on a mantle. It looks beautiful and adds something special to our fireplace. Garlands are great because you can find one for every season and time of the year. I decorate on top of our fireplace every season, but winter is my favorite.
I love winter and I enjoy filling my space with winter-themed pieces for the holidays, opposed to just buying Christmas decor. Winter pieces can stay up until the end of the winter season, but Christmas decor comes down after New Year’s Day. If you’re me, your Christmas decor is packed up on January 2nd. I leave my winter decor up until the end of the winter season. I love snowmen, neutral colors, skiing decor, and pine trees that are not lit. I love every bit of winter and I always bring the beauty of winter to our farmhouse. I’m also obsessed with Nutcrackers and I have quite a few (I had to stop myself from buying more this year). My love for Nutcrackers stems from my love for The Nutcracker ballet, which I believe is the most beautiful tribute to Christmas. The music, the costumes, and the magic from The Nutcracker inspires me every year. I’ve always viewed Nutcrackers as protective soldiers that bring good luck during the holiday season, but they’re also really beautiful.
A few weeks ago, I had stumbled across a three-foot, indoor Santa that I really wanted, but I decided to wait on buying it. I went back a few days later with Andrew and Greyson to buy it and it was sold out. Greyson and I drove around for an entire day, to six different stores searching for one, but no one had a three-foot Santa. Andrew, who is the world’s greatest husband, decided to surprise me. He bought me the most gorgeous, three-foot Santa online. I almost cried when I pulled the Santa out of the box. It was so thoughtful and that’s what the holidays are all about…making the ones you love smile. I love falling in love with the season and soaking in every day spent at home. I love being home for the holidays and surrounded by my decor, Christmas tree, and my family. Take some time today to decorate, listen to Christmas music, and be inspired by the holidays. Have some egg nog and cozy up under a favorite blanket. It’s a wonderful time to relax, celebrate, and appreciate what you have. A home can be as magical as you make it. The magic lives within you.
Stay tuned for a special blog post (after the holidays) dedicated to transforming your Christmas tree into a winter tree, so that you can leave your tree up throughout the winter and enjoy it longer.
Do you know the saying, “Don’t sweat the small stuff (and it’s all small stuff.”? The saying is a reminder not to worry about little things that don’t matter (and much of what people worry about consists of little things). Well, I am someone who sweats the small stuff, always. I am someone who suffers from severe anxiety and I have my entire life. When I was a little girl I would stay up until two in the morning organizing my toys and my room, decorating every inch of my space, and from day one I’ve been someone who needs to feel in control of my things and my life, hence my attention to detail. Having anxiety is something that’s incredibly hard to describe to those who don’t suffer from it, because when you have anxiety your mind operates quite differently. Your mind never stops and your emotions are overwhelming.
For me, having anxiety comes in waves. I’m standing on a beautiful beach and some days the waves are calm and steady. I can swim and enjoy the water. But, some days the waves are violent and are crashing all around me. The waves are dark and endless. I cannot keep my footing and I’m drowning under rough water. This week I happened to wake up in turbulent water, drowning. My anxiety has been overwhelming for three days and I’m just now starting to see a calm in the water and I can finally start to plant my feet firmly in the sand. When my anxiety is at a 10 (on a scale from 1-10 and 10 being the highest) I start to feel depressed and fearful. My anxiety has been at a steady 10 the past week. Sometimes, I just need to lay down and cuddle under a comfy blanket and cry. Anxiety is very real and very scary. It can be crippling and I know this better than anyone. It can ruin any day. It can make you feel alone, terrified, and angry. It is also a reminder that despite my weaknesses, I am incredibly strong.
When I was younger I could barely go to school some days because the feeling of being trapped in a building, or in a classroom with a ton of people, is terrifying to me. I’ve never been able to go to concerts or festivals because there’s just too many people and too much unknown (lack of control). I love intimate settings, spending time with my closest friends, being outdoors (the beach, the mountains, on my farm), and I even love New York City, but when I’m in the city the day needs to be on my terms (my plan). I’m also a true homebody and an introvert. I love being home, I don’t enjoy making endless plans, and I don’t need to be surrounded by people constantly. I’m actually okay being alone and I’m very independent. I am happiest when I’m home with Greyson, with no plans. I can cook, read, write, clean, go for a walk, or go to the farm for a couple of hours. I love feeling free.
Anxiety has consumed me for so long that it’s a part of me. It feels like a body part. If I no longer had anxiety I would lose a part of me and what makes me who I am. Nothing makes me more upset than when someone tries to make me feel bad, or crazy for having an anxiety attack, something I literally cannot control. There’s nothing meaner than someone calling you crazy, or telling you to get a grip when you’re in the middle of a complete breakdown. When you’re at your most vulnerable the only people that should be around you are the ones who take the time to understand and be there for you. If someone doesn’t care to understand or to even listen, they don’t deserve to be in your space and that’s the honest truth. I have lost friends, lovers, and acquaintances in my life who didn’t care about my emotions and they didn’t deserve the best parts of me, because they couldn’t handle my worst. We all have dark and light parts to us and that’s what makes us a complete person. I will never leave someone or judge someone based on their dark parts if they’ve shown me the beauty of their light.
As a mom, I am always honest about emotions with Greyson. I don’t believe in lying to my child about how I’m feeling, because they will experience the same emotions at some point. I will always be a safe space for Greyson to feel however he wants to feel. Children are smart and intuitive. They can see us crying, feeling overwhelmed, or getting angry about something. There’s no reason to lie or hide the truth from them. It’s so important to treat our children like real people. Greyson wouldn’t believe me if I’m balling my eyes out but at the same time saying, “I’m fine, I’m not crying.” Well, obviously I’m crying. He has eyes and ears and knows what’s happening. For example, if I’m feeling anxious and I start to cry I tell Greyson, “Baby, I’m okay. I’m just feeling very anxious and a little sad right now, but you make me so happy and my emotions have nothing to do with you.”. He’s my reason for smiling and I always tell him that. I love when I’m stressed and Greyson looks right at me and tells me that it’s okay. He’s so bright and sweet.
He understands. He knows when mommy is having a hard day or when I’m angry about something. I will always be open and honest with him because it will help him learn to express himself and his emotions as he grows up. I always tell him that emotions are big and powerful and it’s okay to be upset, but it’s important to take a breath and move forward. It’s not the way we feel that’s the issue, it’s the way we handle our emotions and move beyond them that’s important. Greyson is almost three so naturally he has tantrums, gets frustrated when something doesn’t work the way he thinks it should, and he gets overly excited from time to time. That’s normal, mamas. I allow him to be upset, but I always remind him to breathe, take a moment, and then talk to me about why he’s feeling the way he’s feeling. I never want him to feel ashamed of his emotions because they’re natural. It’s unnatural to hide your emotions and keep things bottled up. It’s not healthy to pretend everything’s okay when it’s clearly not. I also always tell him that if something makes him upset, it doesn’t have to make sense to other people. Sometimes, we don’t understand why others are upset, but the reasons don’t really matter…what matters is that they’re feeling upset in the moment and we should just respect their space and feelings.
I could write a book about anxiety and how to live with it and learn from it, and maybe one day I will, but for now I will leave you with one more thought…
Life is scary and overwhelming for everyone, so even if you think you’re the only one with anxiety, or the only one whose having an awful week, remember that you’re not alone. So many others are also struggling to stay above water and they too are feeling alone. You’re not crazy for feeling the way you feel. You’re human and you’re so much stronger than your worst days. The waves will always be there but the water won’t be rough forever. There’s always a beautiful calm after a storm. This too shall pass.
Hey loves! I apologize for being absent for so long, but I’ve been incredibly busy and I haven’t felt inspired to write. I went from writing until three in the morning every night as a teenager to forcing myself to sit down, write, and blog as an adult. I love words, writing, and literature, but as a busy mama I have to remind myself that sometimes I need to just sit down, quiet the world, and write my thoughts. As a writer, I know I’m talented at inspiring people through words and writing used to be my favorite thing in the world…it was my outlet and it saved me more times than I can count. I am happy to be back!
I am going to be twenty-six on Thursday which feels absolutely insane. I can’t believe I’m going to be twenty-six years old, twenty-six laps around the sun, but at the same time, age has always been just a number to me. I’m not someone who cares too much about birthdays, but I do love to celebrate in style with a pretty outfit, a sparkly day, and gifts. Birthdays remind me of being a little girl, waking up with so much excitement and joy for the day ahead. I told my husband, Andrew that I want a low-key, cozy birthday this year spent at home. We are ordering food from one of our favorite restaurants, eating at home, and watching a good movie. Saturday, Andrew, my parents, my beautiful son Greyson, my best friend Danny, his boyfriend Noah, and I are going to New York City for the day and having a Gossip Girl style brunch on the Upper East Side, hosted by my wonderful family. I am happier than I’ve ever been in my life and I am sure that twenty-six will be amazing.
Andrew and I started a business over the summer and it’s been beyond successful, which I’m very thankful for. We are booked until the end of December and we’re already booking some jobs for the springtime. We are an exterior repair company that provides the highest quality workmanship on any exterior project from roofing to decks. I do all of the marketing, scheduling, and I manage the relationships with our clients. I’m so proud of the company we’ve built and I love being able to work from home and spending endless time with Greyson. I have a fashion and marketing background and I’m currently enrolled at Parsons getting my Fashion Business Certification which has also been keeping me busy. I am more than halfway done with my courses and they’ve been time-consuming, yet inspiring. I will always love my days in the fashion retail environment and somedays I miss it, but the best decision I’ve ever made is becoming a stay at home mom. I work (I run two successful businesses), but my main job is being a mom to an almost three year old. My husband is amazing for allowing me to be whatever I want to be and do whatever I want to do. I know that not everyone has the luxury to stay at home and I will always be grateful for my husband for providing for us, supporting me endlessly, and helping me to create the life I’ve always wanted. At the end of the day he is my best friend and we work very well together running our business. I’ve been asked multiple times, “How do you run a business with your spouse?”. Well, we both have the same goals, beliefs, and even when we disagree, we respect one another enough to listen to each other and to see beyond our own thoughts. He respects me and knows that he couldn’t do the marketing, or be organized the way we are without me, and I know that I could never replace a roof for a client without him. He is insanely talented at what he does and I am insanely talented at what I do. If you and your spouse are solid, great friends, and trust each other, you can work with each other. You find a perfect balance. We do what we do for our life together and for Greyson.
I started decorating for winter and the holiday season today, which made me so happy. My anxiety has been high the past couple of weeks and I don’t know why, which is the norm for me when I’m dealing with my anxiety. Some weeks I feel as though the waves will not stop crashing and other weeks I can feel the calm, peaceful water around me. Living with anxiety is never easy and I find that doing the little things that make you truly happy and at peace can change your mood and mindset. As soon as I woke up this morning (Greyson and I slept in until 8 am) we realized it was a colder, rainy day and I knew what I wanted to do. We packed up our fall decor and put it in the attic, went to Target and bought a few new winter decor pieces (snowmen, dish towels, candles, and a winter sheet set for my bed), and started getting all of our holiday decor down from the attic (I have so much holiday and winter decor that I am bordering on having a problem). I am obsessed with our home, decorating, and a beautiful aesthetic so this is my favorite time of the year. I get to be even more creative than usual. I can’t wait to set up our new, snow-flocked, artificial Christmas tree from The King of Christmas that I ordered over the summer (yes, I know…I am crazy). Greyson loves the holidays, too, which makes me happy. Growing up, my mom went all out decorating for Hanukkah and Christmas. We had a huge, 7 foot, artificial Christmas tree in the front of our home, in a room that was a fancy, small living room, that we would light up with colored lights, and decorate with millions of ornaments. Then, my mom would fill every room in the house with a 3 foot pre-lit Christmas tree and each tree was themed. She had angels and Santas everywhere and the fridge was always filled with homemade egg nog (the world’s best egg nog) and cookies. She made it a special, magical time of the year and that is why I have carried on that tradition. I feel the happiest when it’s cold, I am snuggled in a cozy sweater, and Christmas music is playing.
Before I sign off, for now (more posts to come this week) I wanted to touch on the fact that the older I get the more I realize how much of an introvert I am, which makes sense because I’m a writer and a creative person. I am a true homebody and I love being at home. I hate making plans and I’m not someone who needs to see friends and other people every day. I love my friends, my family, and I am a very friendly person, but I’d much rather be home. I take really good care of my hair and skin, also, so I love not having to wear any makeup and being able to keep my hair natural when I’m home. I prefer being as natural as possible because I feel that is the healthiest way to be. When I do go out, make plans, and have a reason to dress up I put so much thought and creativity into my hair, makeup, and outfit. I don’t know how people go out every night and fill their weekends with endless plans, but to each their own. I need my at-home, cozy time (every day).
I am so happy to be back and to be filling my blog with fun, inspirational posts again. Stay tuned for more this week from deep diving into the world of anxiety to motherhood. Thank you for reading and be sure to subscribe to my blog via email to stay up to date on the latest.
Happy International Women’s Day to all of the badass women out there who’ve made marks on this world. To all of the selfless mamas that care for children (some of them without a partner) and raise the next generation of inspiring individuals, thank you. To all of the female nurses and doctors that keep us alive and comfort us in times of great pain with soothing words, thank you. To all of our favorite female teachers who showed us the power and beauty of words, wisdom, and learning, thank you. To all of the women who paved the way from Susan B. Anthony and Eleanor Roosevelt to Hillary Clinton, thank you for making waves, changes, and igniting the fire. There was a time when the glass ceiling described by so many women only had cracks in it, but we’ve now shattered that glass ceiling. We have a female Vice President! I felt so proud of America during the inauguration of Biden and Harris. It was a historic day in America and one I’ll never forget.
It’s unbelievable that not that very long ago women didn’t have the same rights as men. They weren’t viewed as equal. They didn’t go to college, work outside of the home, stand up to their man (or their father), and they weren’t allowed to vote. We’ve made tremendous, heavy steps forward but there’s still sexism in this world. In certain parts of India young girls are sold into marriage as young as thirteen and abused by their “partners”. Women every day are raped, abused, and told that they don’t matter. Women are still viewed as less than in the United States in various ways, companies like Victoria’s Secret, for example, exploit women to make a profit by selling a perfect, female fantasy, and funny enough VS was created by a man. That company has treated their models and the females that make them their money horribly. Now, that’s Victoria’s dirty little secret. Women are expected to act a certain way in this country, be a certain image, weight, and personality to attract men. But, as I said before, we’re in a better place than we were in the past and I’m proud of the women who walked before me, whether in flats or stilettos.
I find inspiration in the women I know and I’m insanely proud of the woman I’ve become. My story is beautiful and my life is exactly what I want it to be. I’m free to be who I am and to love who I want to love. I love and live without boundaries and that’s everything. I’m a mom, a wife, a stay-at-home mom, a business owner, a student, a ballroom dancer, a writer, and a farmer. My husband supports me, loves me unconditionally, and allows me to be myself. This world is filled with good guys just like my man who support and love women from their mothers and sisters to girlfriends and wives.
I can rock the vote and speak as loudly as I want, letting my opinion shake the ground. I can write a blog post that inspires women and men of all ages and feel the respect from my readers. I can have conversations with my female friends about our goals, dreams, and passions and know that whatever we want to do, we can do. We can crush our goals, create the lifestyle we want, and live without regrets. It’s an ever changing world and the women we love have impacted it in gorgeous ways. Take a moment to call your mom, grandmother, sister, aunt, friend, girlfriend, or wife and tell them how amazing they are. Raise a glass to the groundbreaking, beautiful, powerful women who surround us and who empower us. We can be moms and powerhouses. We can be models and teachers. We can be farmers and truck drivers. We can be soldiers and doctors. We can be anything we want and it’s thanks to so many females that walked before us and paved a never-ending road for the women of today and the women of tomorrow.
To all of the little girls out there, remember that you’re full of magic, strength, and the possibilities are endless. Never allow anyone, man or woman, to tell you who you are. You tell the world who you are.
Life with a two-year-old is busy, tiring, and beautiful and I wouldn’t trade my days with Greyson for anything. Being a mama is an adventure, but keeping up with an active, growing, little man can be exhausting. I thank the universe for Greyson, his sweetness, and his smarts. He truly amazes me. I’m lucky enough to be home with him every day, which allows me to see all of the special moments, but I also see all of the tantrums, because I’m the one there 24/7. Mamas, it’s okay to admit that our two-year-olds are a lot to handle at times. They don’t call it terrible twos for no reason! They’re discovering their little voices, but they still can’t fully explain what they want, need, or how they’re feeling, which leads to frustration and the infamous tantrums. I do have to say that Greyson is really good and I’m grateful for that, but he does have tantrums. How do I handle them when they do occur?
The key to handling a tantrum is to ignore most of the dramatics. Toddlers are famous for over the top gestures because their emotions are overwhelming and they know tears and fits will lead to attention. The fire will burn out and they’ll snap out of their agitated state fairly quickly, but yelling, spanking, and overreacting make the situation worse. I don’t believe in spanking, at all. I’ve lost my cool from time to time and have yelled at him when he’s had a tantrum, but I don’t like to yell, either. I remain calm, which makes a huge difference.
If Greyson is really having a moment I just sit him in his height chair, or on the couch in our living room for a moment, and I tell him to sit there until he calms down, which usually works. Sometimes, all you need to do is redirect their attention and focus. Toddlers don’t like when they don’t understand, or when something they’re playing with isn’t doing what they want it to do. If your toddler is playing with a toy that’s bothering them, take it away. Give them something else. Take a moment to show them something interesting, whether it’s a trick, a book, or something around them. They love to learn, discover, and feel as though they’re included. I’m always asked how I keep Greyson so well behaved while grocery shopping, or browsing the aisles at stores such as Target. Well, one Greyson loves Target…haha. He clearly takes after his mama. Two, when I’m grocery shopping I make him feel included in the process. I ask him what he wants (even though I already have a precise list), I give him his own little list to hold, I point out all of the colors, shapes, and foods around us and ask him to name them, I talk to him constantly, and I allow him to say hi to people, giggle, and talk, which makes him feel as though it’s a fun experience. It’s important to make them feel as though errands, chores, and daily activities are fun, not an issue. I’m a positive, upbeat person and I feel as though that rubs off on Greyson.
During the colder months it’s harder to keep your toddler active and sane (I know it’s a challenge), because we’re indoors for most of the time. Also, COVID-19 hasn’t helped. We really haven’t gone too many places, because we’ve been cautious over the past year. We did spend a lot of time in the snow, but Greyson got tired of it after a while. I’m a cold weather gal, but after the amount of snow we had this year I’m ready for summer! When it was too cold to be outside I let Greyson watch movies that he loves, play for hours with his toys, we’d eat lunch together, and I’d include him in my daily activities from cleaning to fun projects. We have a farm, luckily. Now that the weather is warming up we go to the farm once a day, at least and he runs around with his two sheep that we raised, Olaf and Juniper, and he spends time with the other animals (goats, sheep, alpacas, chicks, etc.). He loves the animals and being outside, just like Andrew and I.
I know that being a parent isn’t always easy, but your day is as good as your outlook. If you walk through life with negative energy, that vibe will rub off on your children. Greyson is very much like me and Andrew. We’re both optimistic and full of energy. No day is perfect and even the ones that are pretty damn close aren’t without minor inconveniences. Let the little things go, smile and laugh more than anything else, and enjoy the time with your children. You want your child to know at the end of every day that no matter what, everything will always be okay. It’s our job to make everything okay. I’ve also been asked what are my favorite foods to feed Grey because we all know toddlers can be picky.
I love healthy choices for myself and for my family, but Greyson doesn’t always want what we’re eating, which is okay. Usually, he does eat what we give him and if he doesn’t we try the same food again later. Don’t allow your toddler to dictate every meal, give them only a couple of choices per meal, and be firm with the choices. My favorites (and Greyson’s favorites) are…
Eggs (scrambled) 🥚
Organic, all-natural Apple Juice 🧃
Vanilla Almond Milk 🥛
Pears 🍐
Bananas 🍌
Kiwi 🥝
Pineapple 🍍
Cubed cheese (sharp cheddar, Colby Jack, or Pepper Jack) 🧀
Organic chicken nuggets (sometimes with ketchup) 🐔
Goldfish (he loves these as a snack and they’re way healthier than most snack foods)
Cereal with fruit 🍌
Homemade pizza bagels (I make these constantly and he loves them!) 🥯
Homemade pita bread pizza with sauce and cheese 🍕
Corn muffins
Croissants 🥐
Apples 🍎
Life with my two-year-old is a beautiful chapter and I love that he’s my best friend. He makes me smile, laugh, and think about life differently than I did prior to becoming a mommy. I love hearing him say new words, discover new things around him, and play independently with his favorite toys. He’s such a light in a world filled with chaos and darkness. Also, allow your child to grow up at their own pace. Never compare your child to another because they’re all different and special. If your toddler isn’t ready for potty training just yet, that’s okay. If your toddler is still learning to put together sentences, that’s okay. Tell your little one how special, smart, and funny they are every single day. Enjoy the little moments because they’re the big ones.
I was never someone who felt comfortable in school and girls were never receptive of me or who I was. Even as a little girl, I was always confident, outspoken, and different. I grew up differently than the girls I knew, surrounded by dogs, cats, horses, donkeys, and other animals that my mom and I rescued. My mom’s an artist and I grew up surrounded by art, knitting, sewing, bright color, and an unconventional parenting style. My parents never pushed me or judged me and I was always allowed to be who I wanted to be, do what I wanted to do, and explore what I wanted to explore. I didn’t have boundaries. I also lived an only child lifestyle, because my brother is much older than me, and he only lived in the same household as me when I was a baby, which forced me to be creative, independent, and fierce.
I went to a private preschool, a public kindergarten, and then I was in private school again until entering into middle school. I decided I didn’t want to go to a private high school. My parents and I figured it would be easier to transfer into public school in middle school, rather than high school, but it wasn’t easy at all. I was always treated like the new girl who wasn’t accepted or understood and I just never felt as though I belonged. I went to a school that in my opinion, was very polarizing towards many of the students. I’m a social butterfly and I can get along with anyone, but in a school environment, I never felt like the best version of myself. School was suffocating, scary, and unremarkable to me. I learned more outside of the classroom than I ever did sitting behind a desk. But, I was respectful towards my teachers and the other staff, I got great grades, and I pushed myself to do my absolute best while I was in school. I was accepted into all of the colleges I applied to, including The Savannah College of Art and Design, which I was thrilled about. Unfortunately, after enduring more than one trauma during high school I wasn’t emotionally able to go away to school.
During my elementary school years I was suffering from a stomach ulcer, which went undiagnosed until I was twelve years old. It was finally treated and by age fourteen my stomach began to normalize, but I still get horrible cramps now and then. Your stomach is a muscle and it remembers the pain and the trauma. It was hard as a child explaining to other children and adults that I was in excruciating pain and no one believed me. Even my teachers thought I was lying and making it all up for attention, which never made any sense to me. I remember in third grade my gym teacher, who was really nasty, had us running laps around an outdoor track. I began to cramp so badly I couldn’t breathe. I told her I needed to go home and she called me a liar to my face and made me sit in the corner away from the other kids. I missed so much school and I’m convinced that’s why I’m horrible at math. I missed too many of the basic math components to ever truly catch up. Oh well, I was never meant to be a math guru, but it made it harder for me to feel normal in school when all of my peers understood math and got good grades and I was constantly struggling in that subject area.
When I was in first grade I joined my private school’s after-school dance program and I fell in love. I had an amazing dance teacher, the girls and I meshed well, and I was good at it. We did a little hip-hop and Jazz, but mostly we learned and focused on ballet. Ballet was so beautiful to me. I loved being able to express myself through body movement, the sparkly tutus, and the feeling of the lights hitting me when I was on the floor. Every day after school I had dance class and then every month we had our dance recital on a Friday night. I’ll never forget going with my dad to buy my leotards, ballet slippers, and tutus and feeling so excited to dance. Dance was the only time I ever felt absolutely comfortable at school. As soon as I stretched and stepped foot onto the dance floor I was home. My teacher was incredible, sparkly, and had been dancing her entire life. She instilled in us motivation, teamwork, and hard work, but she also was so kind, realistic, and easygoing. She never made any of us feel bad about ourselves, which isn’t always the case in the dance industry. I will never forget stretching every dance class to Jesse McCartney, Christina Aguilera, and Britney Spears…oh, the music of the early 2000’s. Take me back…haha.
I wound up switching private schools, a couple of times after my favorite school closed its doors. I was in the same dance class at my favorite school from first grade until third grade and I learned more than I ever could’ve imagined. I’m so thankful for those days and the experience. In fourth grade I went to a private school in Princeton, NJ and they offered a competitive and advanced ballet class. They also offered mandarin and french classes (fancy, huh?). The first week in the ballet class was all about impressing the teacher and actually placing in the class in order to continue with ballet. Anyone who didn’t place was able to choose a different elective and pursue a different passion, but after days of stressing and pushing myself, I placed in the class and I was able to continue dancing. We focused on ballet, but our dance teacher had a contemporary dance background, so we learned a lot of different techniques and I did two shows at the school during my time there. The shows were terrifying and very different than the dance recitals at my old school, which were casual and laid back. All of the girls I danced with were equally talented, or even better than I was in ballet and many of the girls planned on pursuing ballet professionally. A couple of the girls were already eating differently and trying their very best to be as small as possible, which was never my goal. I always wanted to be healthy. I was small to begin with and never believed in dieting or starving myself as a young, growing girl. I still don’t believe in any of that. I’ll never forget sitting in the ballet room in the fancy private school, admiring the light that flooded through the large floor to ceiling windows, the expensive hardwood floors, and the mirrored walls. I felt as though I was in a fairytale (or a Barbie movie) every time I entered that room. Dance makes you feel like magic.
I stopped dancing after I left private school in sixth grade, but I still danced in my room and choreographed little routines. I’d spin around and fall to the ground gracefully, with the lights dimmed and a favorite song playing loudly. When I was in my early twenties I finally exited from an abusive relationship and I found myself going to a Valentine’s Day dance at a ballroom dance studio that my mom danced at. I watched two talented dance instructors in a room across from me doing a sexy, dramatic, Argentine tango and I said to myself, “I’m going to learn how to do that.” and I did. A week later, I started ballroom dancing and I’m so thankful for the art form because it truly saved me at a time in my life when I needed some sparkle and distraction. I’ll never forget the first time I did Argentine tango and my previous dance instructor/partner looked at me, smiled, and said,”That’s your dance.”. I fell in love with tango (American and Argentine) and I excelled at it, but I explored other dances, and by the time I found out I was pregnant I had performed in countless showcases (the sparkly, holiday shows were my favorite), received recognition and awards, and had learned so much. My previous instructor/partner taught me that it’s never too late to become who you really are. Sadly, my previous instructor/partner left the studio, which is the absolute worst for a dancer, because you connect with a certain dance partner over anyone else. You need that connection in order to perform at your best and to show off your passion. I danced until I was about five months pregnant (with a different instructor/partner), but my equilibrium was off and I felt exhausted after my sessions, which made me realize I needed to focus solely on becoming a mom. I left the studio and after becoming a mama to the most beautiful boy in the world I took a little break from dance and didn’t return until right before COVID-19. I was actually accepted into Stockton Universities (New Jersey) dance program, but I decided to focus on fashion and marketing, which is my life by getting my certification in Fashion Business at Parsons School of Design-The New School (this year). I’m currently finishing up my first course, Fashion Merchandising. Who knows though, in the future maybe I’ll get a dance degree and open my own studio (which I used to dream of), but I’ve always seen myself sticking to fashion as a career. I have years of fashion and marketing experience under my belt and I can style an outfit better than most.
I decided to go to a different studio in 2020 and I met my now dance partner/instructor and I’ve enjoyed every minute of being back on the dance floor. My new partner/instructor is incredible and I’m so glad we have that connection. I danced through 2020, the pandemic, and our new normal. I try to go to the studio at least once a week, but as a busy mama (with other passions) sometimes my priority isn’t dance (that’s life as a mama). I’ve grown so much as a dancer over the years and I’m really proud of myself. I look at all of my dance costumes, photos, and videos and I smile. Dancers don’t dance because they want to…they dance because they have to. They can’t stay off of the dance floor and that’s always how I’ve felt. When I step foot onto the hardwood floor in my ballroom dance shoes the world falls still and I feel so alive. I’m so focused when I’m dancing and for that period of time, while I’m on the floor, nothing else matters. It’s therapeutic, beautiful, and a true commitment. It’s an expensive commitment to lessons, shoes, showcases, and costumes. It isn’t something you do on a whim. It’s something you do because you love it. Dancers watch what they eat, what kind of physical activities they participate in outside of dance, and they need to be careful not to push themselves too hard, or far. I’ve never hurt myself ballroom dancing but I have hit/kicked my partner accidentally (it happens) and I’ve done complex tricks that could’ve ended badly, but that’s why we practice over and over again. It’s a lifestyle, just like iceskating, horseback riding, and swimming. I don’t eat anything before dance because its always better not to dance with a full stomach, but I drink an abnormal amount of water. I don’t like to run because it’s bad for your knees and I have incredibly strong legs. which dancers need. You don’t want a knee or leg injury as a dancer. I love the feeling of pure bliss after a dance session, knowing I rocked it. I’m currently learning nightclub two step and as a country girl, I’m in heaven. During my last dance session I finally nailed the steps, which always feels great.
The dance industry isn’t always welcoming, comfortable, or pleasant. As a girl who used to do ballet I know that the dark side exists and I’ve witnessed various issues. Girls literally kill themselves to be the absolute best, the prettiest, and to make it to the top. Body image issues are a huge problem in the dance and gymnastics world. There have been studies and books published about the dark side of the dance industry, dance addiction, and social isolation due to dance. Studies have shown that many dancers are incredibly isolated and lonely people. Some women spend too much money on competitions, travel, and over the top costumes. Others starve themselves, recreate their image (spray tans, hair, and nails), and become a dance addict. But, many like myself dance because we love it and it’s never become an issue in our lives. I will admit that at one point I was spending way too much money on costumes, shoes, and showcases, but now that I’m a wife and mama my priorities have shifted and that’s not who I am anymore. I save my money and I’m careful with any purchases. Dance will always be a part of me and I cherish every routine, song played, and moment on the dance floor. I’m that girl that hears a song and immediately goes, “I did a dance routine to that song!”. Dance lives within you and dancers aren’t born…they’re taught. I’m thankful for my connection to dance, for hardwood floors, and for glitter
takeabiteoutofme 