You came into my life like a hurricane and I was a flower in desperate need of rain. You were there through the darkness, the fear, the uncertainty, but I was too scared and naive to jump. You’re all my heart ever talks about & I can’t quiet the whispers, but you’re just a thought. You’re not a reality and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss you. I miss the simple nights spent going for walks and venting to each other. I miss the tangled nights in your car…listening to music and your voice, and sitting next to you while you smoked. I miss being carefree and young with you. You made me feel alive and you took me away from a lot of pain. You were so different than any other person in my life, and before I knew it I had fallen for you. I could take you like a dangerous drug. I fell for your darkness and your touch.
I was in such a complicated place then, and I wish I could rewrite a few sentences, but there is no rewind button. Life is about smiling because it happened, even if it ends. I think about who we were to each other and our memories on rainy days. We were a beautiful risk, but I don’t regret any of it. I don’t regret the girl I was with you or the late night passion. I think about the way you made me feel when I’m taking a shot of something strong, or when I’m slipping into sky-high heels. I think about the conversations that meant nothing and the ones that meant everything. Thank you for igniting my soul and for taking me somewhere incredible.
Here’s to you and one of my favorite chapters to read over and over again, Xo.